Excitement? Not always
Most people, when I hear them talking about vampires, think of vampires as somehow lucky and thrilled creatures of the night. Oh, they can live forever, they say. And oh, how cool that must be!
Let me tell you yes, it has its advantages, but often it can also be a bind. A big old bind I tell you. Such as when you really fancy some nice young virgin blood and the streets are void of people. Honestly, last week I spent a good 3 hours looking for a virgin, and all I could find was a very old woman who was clearly anything but! Of course I didn’t resort to biting her. She would have tasted absolutely foul.
Now then, the next question is: what to do?
You’re stuck in your room with no blood, no virgin excitement running through your veins, and it isn’t exactly fun.
Well, aside from looking for english teaching jobs in london – a vamp has to work, you know – a vampire can find other ways to pass the time. Or at least trick himself.
One thing I do when I am very desperate for blood is liquefy a tomato, add purée, and pretend like that is blood. I must get awfully drunk beforehand to create this illusion, of course, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t worth it! Quite to the contrary: every time I do this I get better at tricking. Now, I have myself fooled to levels that you, my mere mortal, would truly not believe!
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